I used to believe that male violence was merely a social phenomenon. Like all things radical in thought, it took me awhile to come around to. It couldn’t be true. I’d known men who were sweet! It was just an excuse for their behavior. We had to hold them accountable! Like all the comforting lies I’d told myself before about plain truths I would repeat these mantras, scoff in incredulity and refuse to see what was right in front of my eyes. This changed over time. I’m not really sure what the “click” was that brought me around to understanding that there was something biologically different about men. Something that made them hunger for the degradation of life. Something that made them delight in necrophilic destruction.
Coming to radical feminism is a process. There is a process of deconstruction, of unlearning that has to take place. Andrea Dworkin wrote that feminism requires precisely what patriarchy destroys in women. Thus in order to begin the process of coming to feminism we stumble like babies beginning to walk. Like taking the training wheels off of our bikes for the first time the process takes time for most women and also means a great deal of hardship. I too cried over the male friends I lost. I am slightly bemused at how pathetic that was at this time from this place I see now just what was lost was nothing more than parasites.
When I began to see the world in new eyes again everything shifted. I would liken the experience to how when a person begins to meditate everything in their life gets worse. My life got worse as I began to lift the veil. I began having nightmares, visions. I attracted all kinds of horrible patriarchal people (male and female) into my life that tortured me. My health, or at least my illusion of health was stripped bare from my body and I was left crippled. Literally. I have lost most of my physical strength and struggle to walk now.
I began to lose women who were initially supportive of my journeying into radical thought. I was going too far. I was a bad feminist. I was judgey. Basically I was doing what they were unwilling to do. Give up the addiction to men. Live a life not based around getting men to change. I didn’t say these things. I didn’t even really think these things. I was just going in the direction of what felt right. They didn’t need to be said and it wouldn’t have mattered because where they were at they weren’t able to really tear off the veil and see the reality I was beginning to be immersed in.
Anyway somewhere along the way I realized I had to stop lying to myself about the male tendency towards oppressing women being merely a social phenomenon. Its not as if what are called “essentialist” texts are widely available. Its funny that that is the case when it is the plain obvious truth. It doesn’t make money by selling women snake-oil and fairy tales though so what publisher is going to print it?
This is all really just backdrop about where I’m at and coming from. I understand if women aren’t there yet but I have faith that given enough honesty and soul searching they will be. What I’m about to talk about now is very shocking and will probably hurt some of the more tender hearts in my reading audience.
My aunt, who loves animals, posted a petition on her facebook last week calling for the closure of orangutan brothels. I don’t even recommend reading all of what is contained in the information about these brothels. Its too disturbing. What is clear to me is that no man has been socialized to rape animals yet they do with frequency. Its considered a real taboo yet animal rescues are continually met with cases of men who infect dogs with venereal diseases and destroy their vaginas with continued rape. Men also rape infants, small children and we supposedly look down on that as well. Yet with frequency men are violating animals and children as well as adult women. I can see so often that women are accustomed to not caring enough about themselves to see the danger in men and get away from it but I’m hoping that those of you in my audience who care about animals will at least admit there has been no great social engineering on the part of patriarchy to encourage men to rape animals. If it is not socialization then that causes this phenomenon it is something else. I argue that it is an inherent urge of men to stick their dicks into anything they can and all the “socialization” in the world and “raising our sons to be different” will not ebb the tide of men sticking their dicks into whatever animal, child or woman they can.