Monthly Archives: April 2013

So You Think You’re A Dyke

Are you a woman who has previously considered yourself heterosexual or perhaps maybe bisexual?  Has that come into conflict with your feminist ideals?  Are you catching yourself thinking more and more about how attractive other women are?  Do you get jealous when your female friends who ‘aren’t quite there yet’ talk about their totally boring nigels?  Do you kind of want to put your arm around another woman, play with her hair, smell her skin?  You are not alone.  You may in fact be going through what many of us already have.

Political Lesbianism.

If you’ve previously considered yourself a supporter of basic human rights for gay people you may find these feelings at odds with what you’ve previously been told about sexuality.  You see, we’re told by most gay rights activists that sexuality is an inherent trait, that its something we’re born with.  That it cannot change.  This view of sexuality makes sense if you’re fighting crypto fascists for basic human dignity.  It doesn’t make so much sense if you’re someone whose going through these feelings, yet haven’t before.  Or not to the level you currently are.

You see, the big con in all of this understanding of sexuality is that heterosexuality is actually a learned behavior.  It is not natural.  At least not in the sense it exists institutionally today.  In fact, it is the very conduit by which the global oppression of womankind is taking place.  Each man gets to own his own woman, or group of women depending on local custom and enjoy what amounts to nothing but glorified prostitution and drudgery from them for as long as he wants/is convenient to him and the preservation of his precious male seed.  

All of this is background stuff really.  I want more to talk about this phenomenon.  Yes, its a phenomenon.  Political lesbianism pisses a lot of people off for various reasons but it is a real thing happening, it is something that feminists go through as a result of the awakening that our consciousness brings.

Theres a lot to shed.  First off there’s the nigels.  Shed those things, my god knock it off with the nigels already.  They can’t and won’t ever change, you’re deluding yourself into thinking otherwise.

Secondly there’s the exposure to creepy male sexuality.  If you were lucky enough to choose the man who would *deflower* you.  I want you to think about your first sexual experiences.  They were pretty good right?  Up until he stuck his penis in you, right?  You were having all manner of intense sexual feelings that then had to be sublimated into doing what he wanted, right?  Then there’s all the porn shit men bring into sex.  If you’re a woman reading this there’s no hope for nigel to not be porn sick.  They’ve all been exposed to more porn than any generation before.  Porn is everywhere, it is the air they breathe and it is the shit they act out on your body.  That porn reel shit they have going on when they’re “making love” to you has an effect on your sexuality and psyche.  You need to work on that.  Its traumatic shit and you need to get it out of your system.  I can’t recommend anything in specific.  For some women, reading about stockholm syndrome helps, for some women mysticism helps, for others various forms of therapy, reflection, study, meditation all help to get that shit out of your body.

To do that you’re gonna need to give yourself time.  Time to heal, time to really think about what it is you want, explore your feelings.  That time should be spent in celibacy.  Do not pursue relationships with other women until you have began doing this work.  There’s enough trauma in this world, lets not inflict it on each other, ok?

So you’ve been doing all this stuff, rethinking your sexuality, reclaiming it, etc.  You’re noticing intense feelings about some women you meet.  You’re attracted to them.  You start to remember little bits and pieces of your life you’d buried.  Times before your feminism when you were attracted to women, when you had intense erotic moments with other women.  You start to realize just how much you’d been repressing just so you could make it work with nigel.

That’s what I mean when I talk about political lesbianism.  I don’t really feel the need to differentiate myself apart from other lesbians except when they’re attacking political lesbians.  Because I am one.  I chose to be a lesbian.  I was bisexual for many years.  Had relationships with other women but repressed a lot of my feelings, was scared of being a dyke.  It took feminism to break that shit down for me.  Make me realize how trauma-bonded I was to men and how it never worked with them because it could never work with them.  This choice to love women is a positive affirmation of my desire.  It wouldn’t have been possible for me without feminism.

I of course, am not the only one whose been through this. That is why the concept exists.

I also believe heterosexual relationships are inherently unequal.  So whether you love women or not, please, love yourself.  Dump your nigel.

 

Big Important Male Ideas!

The HIStory of all hitherto society is the history of male classes and male ideas jockeying and jacking each other off in the game of which group of men with the biggest dick will have their say in how female labor will be exploited.  Well, I’m generalizing maybe a TAD bit but lets put on our thinking caps and look at it through a female-centric lens.

Certainly the female sex class* has been a massive part of every political upheaval known to humanity for some pretty obvious reasons:

1) All the bad shit that happens to men happens to women*, and happens to women WORSE.

2) Men are generally cowards that need to be emasculated by women in order to prove their virility in battle/bed/what have you.

3) Women have the most to gain from things changing.  (We tend to have the attitude of ‘can it really get worse than this?’ in relation to our perception of reality since we’re at the bottom of every social class.  Even very privileged women feel the degradation of their sex on a daily basis)

Into this situation comes….BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS!

Now we’ve all been exposed to these throughout our lives.  Its actually impossible not to come across them in some form.  BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS! such as “freedom”, “liberty”, “egalitarianism”, “free markets”, “individuals”, “society”, “the greater good”, “reform”, “revolution”, “inclusivity”, etc.  These are common place in the “marketplace of ideas” where the jockeying of men and the ideas that turn them on happens.

But the thing about BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS! is that they aren’t in any way the domain of woman.  Our job is to be the drudges of these BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS!  Men with ideas need coffee, men with ideas need flyers to be passed out, men with ideas need you to raise $$$ so that men with big important ideas can do what they think they need to do to make those ideas happen.  Men with ideas need a sexual outlet, men with ideas need a nice warm home to come to after a hard day of fighting for their ideas where life is idyllic, men with ideas need females to spout their ideas so that these male ideas aren’t exposed for the same old boring male ideas that they are (see Ann Coulter, Naomi Wolf, Christina Hoff Sommers).  You see one BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEA thats time came was “diversity” so every now and then they need a female drudge that can provide the appearance of it taking place.  Despite the fact that this is just a preventative measure by the male ruling class to appease the angry dude classes that they were more powerful than they actually are.

BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS! exist in the world of men.  Women can become attracted to these ideas, especially the more obscure ones as we aren’t exactly fluent in male idea speak.  When this happens women gladly throw themselves into the fray to become drudges to these male ideas.  Workhorses for male revolutions, or counter-revolutions, whichever really doesn’t matter because at the end of the day whats happening or what we want to happen isn’t going to benefit us in any way.

So I’m thinking of this today as I pontificate on twitter.  Some dude was going on about how radical feminists are crazy, tin-foil hat wearing loonies because we don’t want males at our conferences or any of our political activities (since you know, the point of radical feminism is to get away from males and their stupid fucking ideas).  It struck me that of course this is the same BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEA that has existed throughout time that women who don’t enjoy the degradation of our sex are just “crazy”.  Which can be conveniently thrown at any woman at any time no matter what her drudge work to the male gods has been.  It also struck me that this particular issue.  The issue of women being able to meet as a class defined apart from males is coming up against the new crop of BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS! about “gender”.  You see a whole bunch of males are under the impression that they are going to liberate huMANity by their transgression of gender, which their kind has imposed upon women without stop since time immemorial.  They’re angry that there’s this group of women they thought they could hoodwink by appropriating our feminist language who still aren’t willing to go out and be the drudges to their BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS!  They have recruited some women to drudge speak on behalf of them and their ideas.  But at the end of the day whats got them really in such a state is there are women now who have our own ideas, original ideas, women who have a legacy of gutsy women who’ve broken free of male ideas ahead of them.  The time of BIG IMPORTANT MALE IDEAS! is coming to and end.

* I use the terms “female sex class” and “woman/women” interchangeably, like any rational human being.