I want to suggest to you that a commitment to sexual equality with males, that is, to uniform character as of motion or surface, is a commitment to becoming the rich instead of the poor, the rapist instead of the raped, the murderer instead of the murdered. I want to ask you to make a different commitment – a commitment to the abolition of poverty, rape and murder; that is, a commitment to ending the system of oppression called patriarchy; to ending the male sexual model itself.
Andrea Dworkin “Our Blood”.
Its a simple idea but there’s more to be said than just this. Too much of white, western, bourgeois, liberal-feminism is based on the notion that we merely achieve parity with men. This overlooks the basic differences in class and race between men and also reinforces that system which inevitably leads to men being on top.
There is no equality to be achieved in a white-supremacist, capitalist patriarchy, there is no equality to be achieved under imperialism. There is only the passing dream of choosing to be an exploiter, if you can.
The sadistic attitudes of many women who follow this line of thought towards those of us who are open and honest about our own abuse by the hands of this system and those of us who refuse to accept models of “harm reduction” because we intuitively know that one woman abused affects all women, come from a place of identifying with perpetrators over victims. They come from a place of not wanting to be vulnerable to anything (which I can understand psychologically but that doesn’t make it okay).
I struggle everyday with my attitudes towards women like this and it causes me a great deal of pain because its where my internalized misogyny comes out most heavily. I am not willing to allow women who have internalized the value systems of those who have perpetrated against them to sway my convictions towards true liberation, true equity and justice even as they attempt to silence and dismiss my experience. I am going to be vulnerable and I am going to speak my truth and not be hardened, regardless of how much work it takes.