some thoughts on a modern twist

So thanks to Netflix I got around to watching the modern version of The Stepford Wives. A few years ago I organized a showing of the original for a Halloween fundraiser so I’m quite familiar with it and have given the film a lot of thought over the years. What it means as a feminist. There are no good men in Stepford. Just like in reality all men benefit and to varying degrees perpetuate the sex caste system.

In the modern version this is all turned on its head. What was once really just a fierce female triad becomes a gay male inclusive triad of misfits who don’t quite understand or fit in with the town of Stepford. In the original the first woman to change before the eyes of two of the characters bemoans in a consciousness raising group that she feels her husband only married her for her looks and has never loved her. Now we get to learn the lesson that PATRIARCHY HURTS MEN TOO. Or actually not patriarchy, but an obsession with perfection. (More on that later) As the gay best friend character ends up throwing out all his designer clothing and becoming a log cabin republican candidate.

The main couple move to the small town of Stepford after an attempt on the wife’s life. Of course the fact that she was nearly killed by a man is portrayed as her own fault and her faults as a mother and wife for not baking enough and letting her sappy beta male husband wear the pants even though he’s not qualified to at all are also portrayed as character flaws. Even though she begs him not to leave her and agrees to change for him he plots with the men’s association behind her back to turn her into one of the creepy sex robot women the town is overrun with.

I’m going to give away the whole film now so if you haven’t seen it and are enough of a masochist to 1) want to watch it, and 2) not want SPOILERS, discontinue reading.

We see the main character, played by Nicole Kidman become the perfect femme-bot wife and attend a grand party with her husband. Inexplicably her husband dumps her with the president of the men’s association and we see him go back to their headquarters and destroy all the femme bot technology. As he does this the women in the town suddenly go haywire and stop working. The husband’s remote controls no longer work and the women are VERY angry, as well as our GAY BEST FRIEND who is just disgusted at the outfit he’s wearing (teeheehee).

The main character then confronts the leader of the men’s association and he learns she never actually was transformed, it was all an act because her husband is a real man (TM) and didn’t turn his wife into a machine against her consent. (see nice guys, not all men etc). The leader of the association is then revealed to be a ROBOT himself because surprise surprise who is actually behind this fucked up shit? A WOMAN!!!!

A woman who was a scientist, who was accomplished, successful but got a little too old and smart so her husband had to screw around on her. This of course made her go crazy and become obsessed with creating the perfect world of robots. All the men of the town who wanted these robot wives were duped by a female puppetmaster.

So obviously the old witch dies and everything is restored to normal. The husbands even learn their lesson and are forced by their wives to do chores and go grocery shopping (THE AGONY!) Of course nobody gets divorced. Who would divorce someone over something as petty as turning you into a robot sex slave?

So what we have with this retelling of a classic horror story is a great example of how patriarchal reversals work culturally to obfuscate male’s role in creating and perpetuating the oppression of women.

We have the patriarchal lesson that women do it too so men are off the hook. These mythos of happy homemakers and domestic goddesses actually come from the minds of women, not men. Men are lovable dupes who are never responsible for their actions and we must forgive them no matter how fucked up what they do to us is.

The whole terrifying point of the original Stepford Wives is lost but oh isn’t it funny?

Two thumbs down.

I highly recommend watching the original.

Reclamation

I’ve spent this summer in bed. My already sickly body subjected to further atrophy as I struggled to heal from a broken bone, stitches and nerve damage. I’m not there yet but I can now type a bit. I’ve had a lot of time to think and connect with the truth of my life.

We all have a life purpose. Its easy to forget at times because that is the nature of the reality we live in. Everything is structured to make us forget. I’ve been wandering from myself for a long time and even now its hard to face some days. The traumas, betrayals, abuse and horror I’ve lived through don’t really mean much to me anymore. They’re facts of my life like where I was born or what color my eyes are. What really began to make me crazy was realizing how conscious I was through most of it. I’m not saying this universally as a woman, I’m sure other women are unconscious of the disturbing ways in which they betray themselves and their sex but for me it was always a choice and living with that, reintegrating and forgiving myself for it has been a real challenge. The day I broke my arm this year I chose to go against my own intuition strongly telling me not to leave the house. Here I am, someone who tells women to trust their intuition above all else and getting smacked with some serious consequences for not following my own advice. Ironic.

As a radical feminist who happens to also be a mystic I’ve been trying to understand why my path has led here and I wanted to share it with all of you. Radical Feminism is spiritually about reclamation. We are seeking the total connection to our authentic female selves which have been waged war upon by men.

Mary Daly talked of herself as pirate. She saw herself usurping the usurpers, giving us back the tools to connect with our own divinity and power. This kind of stuff is important to me. Not because I think you need to be spiritual or identify with it to be on this path but because we can’t properly do anything for ourselves if we can’t act from that place of trust and power.

Men fear women’s power, this is why they go out of their way, despite having us almost completely enslaved as a caste to reinforce terror in us. This is why they beat, rape, mutilate and slaughter us. The funny thing about it is that we don’t even believe in that power that makes them so uneasy. Without believing in it we are more easily trapped by them. We need to stop reacting to them and behaving in ways that tell them we are concerned with what they think. Its time to reclaim our role as agents in our own destiny as a people. We need to imagine what we would be if patriarchy had never existed and become that. We must love and cling to one another as if we’d never been hurt by anyone. We must go into the world and shape it as if she were ours to act upon. There is no time like the present to embrace the dormant amazon within.

Its a plastic passion

The world humans have constructed for ourselves is mainly artificial.  Even this method of communication, writing, writing black ants onto an automated, perfected MANually constructed instrument such as my beloved laptop is artificial.  With that in mind, given that I am a woman with only so many options as to having a platform to express my truth through, lets together forget that and delve into the topic of authenticity.

Pornography is horror.  It is pure, anadulterated horror but it is held up to be culturally, the height of human expression and liberated, authentic female sexuality.  This is a reversal because as we know it is the job of a prostituted woman to fake lust.  It is the job of the consumer of prostituted women to vampirically drain the prostituted woman of her spirit until she is broken into not being able to feel pure lust again.  The process of recovery for prostituted women is that of recovering an ability to really feel and be present in the moments that make life beautiful.  This is what prostitution and specifically, its branch known as “pornography” does to women.  

It is interesting that so many modern humans have developed such addictions to that which is inauthentic.  The refined foods we eat which make us sick, the hours spent in front of screens, the effort spent always trying to attain that which isn’t instead of feeling alive in the moment.  I’m thinking about this as I’m going through the process of detoxing my body.  I have been addicted to frankenfood for years.  As a woman who grew up in poverty who was raised by a parent who used frankenfood as a drug to cope with their own problems I was kind of set up for the addiction from day one.  When my joints gave out a couple years ago and I began the process of taking chemo drugs, steroids and all manner of harmful fucking shit I was yet again put back into reality where I could ignore my body no longer.

So I’ve started the process of no longer putting refined foods into my body, eating a mainly plant based diet, juicing, and just trying to pay attention to what is happening in each moment that ticks.  At first the addiction seems like the most daunting task on earth.  Its everywhere, how do we escape?  What if I fuck up and eat something that isn’t 100% pure?  What if I absolutely HATE eating what is good for me?  

There is a process the body goes through.  There’s pain, there’s elimination, there’s systems going haywire.  All of this is the body reacting to a change in whats been happening for so long.  But over time I’ve began feeling ill if I don’t have my juice.  If I am not eating enough veggies.  I’ve come to find wheat products to be kind of…passe.  I can now take them or leave them.  This is me going through the process of replacing that which is plastic for that which is real.  I can’t help but make the parallel to the other plastic passions that drive people in the modern era.

Men are easily seduced and taken in by the fake lust that they feel when they consume pornography.  As this lust is fake though, over time their senses became numbed by it.  They can no longer even actually sustain erections when the time comes to be authentically sexual with another person so haywire their system has become.  I guess because I’m going through the process myself regarding frankenfood I can finally understand even more just how fucked up and addicted to necrophilic plastic lust the men who use pornography are.  This isn’t me excusing them by any means, we all make choices and are ultimately responsible for ourselves and how our choices impact others but I guess I can say now that I understand just how easy it is for them to be so sick and not even be aware of it.  What a gift it is to really see the world as it is.

Tattoos as Self Mutilation Revisited

So its been a few months since I first wrote about this topic.  Earlier this week I had more tattoos done.  One of them is even a feminist-themed one.  I definitely will be getting more and am planning out my next one which is gonna be really cool.  The only thing is, getting tattoos, means thinking about them.  Means talking about them with others.  I also tend to go on netflix binges and lately I’ve been watching “LA ink” which deals with a tattoo shop owned by Kat Von D in Los Angeles.  I’ve been amazed watching just how often people’s tattoo ideas are directly related to traumatic events they’ve been through.  Near death experiences, loss of their loved ones, surviving an illness.  With all this blowing around in the caverns of my mind I thought I’d expand on what I talked about last time I blogged on this subject.

I briefly touched on the relation of tattooing to other forms of self-mutilation engaged in by women.  Its a serious issue.  We all know at least one woman whose cut the shit out of herself in order to deal with her own traumatized psyche.  For many women tattooing and body modifications are a way of dealing with the trauma they’ve gone though.  I’m not immune to this and its in the forefront of my mind as a survivor of multiple traumas who also wants a lot of tattoos.  An interesting fact I’ve come across as well is that women are more likely to get tattooed than men.  This isn’t surprising for a number of reasons.  For one, women are used to being fully conscious of their bodies every single day, its only natural a woman would then think about and want to decorate her skin.  For another, women are a lot better at handling pain than men are.  We’re just superior in that way (among many others)  Lastly, as women, and as women who are survivors we’re pretty used to having our reality denied.  We’re gaslighted about our own experiences daily.  We aren’t believed when we talk about what happens to us.  Women just aren’t considered credible.  But tattoos, like all of our experiences are fucking real.  This isn’t something that can be denied or put away.  Its there, for everyone to see.  Like the scars of self-mutilation people might look away or disapprove but they can’t be denied.  They’re there.  Its a comfort thing a woman can look at throughout her life.  Not at all an ideal situation but we make the best with what we have in the here and now.

Now I’m going to jump to something else.  When I wrote about this last I got a lot of feedback from other feminists with tattoos who told me of awful experiences they’ve had with men verbally and even physically attacking them because of their body modifications.  When I was around 20 years old, working in a shop one of the customers who was a middle aged man got up in my face questioning me about my nostril piercing (which I’ve had since I was 15).  I was really confused and thought he was genuinely interested in why I wanted the piercing.  I mean I always wanted it.  Ever since I first saw it.  I remember being 4 years old and imagining what I would look like in the future and there was a nostril piercing in that mental image (as well as tattoos).  He wasn’t actually interested in that though.  He just wanted to abuse me for being stupid enough to think I had a right to do whatever I wanted with my body and thankfully a woman who I worked with that was a few years older than me came over to rescue me from the very rude man who felt entitled enough to wear sweatpants in public and question how other people look.   Nothing like that has happened to me with the tattoos yet and thankfully I’m a bit older and can pretty much defend myself from any dickhead man with a stupid opinion.  I do understand now better though what the problem is with men who have a problem with tattooed women.  My friend commented on previous post that tattoos are an affront to the purity which many men fetishize in women.  A woman who has chosen to tattoo her skin has made a very clear statement, whether conscious or not, that she ultimately sees herself as the one who owns her body.  A lot of men have a problem with that.  They don’t like being reminded that we are autonomous beings with hopes, dreams and ideas that exist out of our functional use to them and their dicks.  

This came to mind recently because my friend was staying at my house for a week and part of our entertainment was her reading the MRA screeds found on manboobz.  Several times these dudes brought up the term “tattooed” in regards to how vile modern women are.  It kind of took me aback at first but then the wheels started spinning.  Obviously professional misogynists would have a problem with women who tattoo their skin.  There’s something positive to tattoos if we can disgust MRAs with our impurity and obvious individuality.  

The flipside of this all is, a lot of men fetishize women with tattoos.  A la “suicide girls” and other “alternative porn” outlets.  Sadly for women living in a patriarchal world, there’s no escape from having men project their own ideas and desires onto us.

Being Disagreeable is the Worst Thing a Woman Can Do

The other day on twitter a woman I follow shared the resolution the New Turns Feminism Conference passed to no-platform feminist writer and activist Julie Bindel.  In the resolution she was referred to as “vile”.  Now this is immediately not a professional or appropriate way to refer to a woman, regardless of how you feel about her.  It smacks of personal bias and not a legitimate excuse for no-platforming someone.  The same woman looked up the definition of vile and shared with us that one of the definitions for it was “disagreeable”.  How interesting!

Because yes, she is disagreeable to quite a few persons out there.  But being disagreeable is what feminism is about.  A disagreeable woman is a good thing.  That is unless of course you believe that it is a woman’s job to be agreeable.  This my dear readers is what I’d like to tackle today.

Third wave feminism/modern liberal feminism today has taken up the platform of promoting transgenderism.  It is considered to be the height of feminist activism.  Male transgenders are regularly given speaking arrangements, book deals and generally sought out as the go-to experts on feminism.  Julie Bindel was no-platformed because she takes a critical stance on the medical practice of transgenderism and follows the “old school” feminist understanding of gender being a social construct.  A harmful social construct which was created to designate women as inferior and subservient to men.  Because she takes this approach she is “disagreeable” and thus not welcome in any debate or discussion.

On my last post a woman in the comments section brought up that a good deal of the anger women receive for being against gender is that we are violating the gendered belief that women exist to have what she calls practical use.  Because Radical Feminists do not fulfill the male fantasy of woman as compassionately accommodating to every whim we are thus “vile” aka disagreeable.  This is why we consistently hear the charge of biological males making “better women than us”.  Of course.  Because in the misogynistic male imagination if a woman is not justifying her existence through being useful and accommodating to every male whim we aren’t actually women.  We’re an aberration.  We are wrong and need to be punished or just admit that we’re actually men or some such sexist shit.

There is no such thing as a man understanding what it feels like to be a woman.  It is the utmost of presumption.  What they are doing is projecting their beliefs about what being a woman is onto our entire sex.  When we do that which disrupts the fantasy.  Like say not being “compassionate” enough or not going along with anything without question we become “vile” and therefore silenced.

Modern liberal feminist projects like the New Turns Feminism Conference are participating in the silencing/punishing of women who do not conform to properly gendered behavior.  The feminist community really needs to have a big think about where all of this GGG agreeable stockholmed girlfriend shit is taking us because this certainly isn’t the feminism our foremothers fought for or most of us even signed up for.

Where Grown Man Meets Little Girl

Something that has consistently disturbed me since becoming familiar with the modern transgender phenomenon is how infantile most of the communication and dialogue around it is.  Oftentimes the propaganda put out looks like creepy little kids drawings or cartoons and they have references to genitalia, etc.

This is also a part of autogynephilic trans fetishism.  I found this website on feminization whereby grown men, often in middle age or older are put through humiliating ritualized feminization which is something actual little girls go through.  These men find erotic pleasure in imagining themselves as little girls going through sexual abuse and forced wearing of demeaning princess clothing.  What is a horrific experience of brutal dehumanization for women is a sexual kink for these men.

This phenomenon is also apparent with late transitioning heterosexual men.  They often will end dressing in the same clothes designed for teen girls.  Another thing that makes them stand out even more in a crowd.
This has often been justified by transgenderists as these men going through a second puberty as they get high on the hormones they’re putting into their bodies and going through the rush of strange feelings that come with said hormones.  However its more than that.  These men have an erotic attachment to the objectification of women and get off on the idea of themselves being the objects of the male gaze.

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“girls” can have penises too! Unfortunately the person who created this is an ADULT.

 

I’ve known all this for awhile but as time progresses

you start to see connections more and more closely, deeply.  The educational comics on transgenderism put out by younger M2Ts have the same creepy, girlhood appropriative vibe.

Another example that I came across recently is “Riley – the adult baby“.  Riley is a transgender male who spends the majority of his life pretending to be a female infant.  None of his imaginary play has anything to do with what its like to be an actual infant girl.  Its a weird creepy male projection of what he thinks female babies are like.  Notice in the video his coy flirtatious shit.  Men LOVE to pretend that is some kind of innate female characteristic and not a result of brutal socialization into a secondary sex role.

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Even the educational images like this have a disturbing childlike naivete to them.  They’re talking about heterosexual fucking causing pregnancy.  Color me SURPRISED!

The people creating these and disseminating them are for the most part adults.  There of course are some teenagers on tumblr sharing them but they aren’t coming from teenaged minds.

Now I wanna ask why its considered inappropriate and wrong for adult women to be creeped out by this and to not want to be around it?  Apart from the consistent sexism of associating womanhood with perpetual childhood, the references to little girls with penises is just nauseating and disturbing on a gut instinctual level.  It’s also becoming our reality as more and more children are being put through transition.  It reeks of sexual grooming and mental illness more than a political statement.

 

“It’s Just Socialization….” Revisited

Since the last time I brought up the topic of men raping animals as proof that male sexual violence is not a result of socialization I’ve come across more info about the phenomenon of animal brothels.  There’s another petition that has been more widely circulated regarding the existence of brothels in Denmark where men can pay to rape dogs.  On Facebook there were even pictures included of animals that had died from being exposed to constant rape.  Another one of those grim dark images I’ll never be able to wash clean from my mind.  That I’ll carry in my soul as long as I live.

So like every time I’ve read about child pornography or the rape of infants, so too I am burdened with carrying this knowledge of what men do to the world around them.  

Now I had some dissent from my previous post on this subject and let me be clear about one thing;  I don’t think every man rapes animals or infants or children.  Some may even find it kind of disturbing.  But like with “regular” rape we have to look at this phenomenon through the eyes of protection and self preservation.

All men are potential rapists.  This is a widely accepted feminist theory.  We know that it is impossible to distinguish between the “nice cuddly guys” out there and the sadistic rapists.  Because of this women have to be on guard 24/7.  Every time I’m out in public I am on guard.  Every man is noted because every man is a potential threat to me as a woman.  We also know that women are more likely to experience rape from a man that they know.  Hey men are lazy, don’t forget that bit of essentialism.  So therefore logically we can deduce that women must be suspect of all men.  Not all women possess the power to read men’s minds so we cannot know for certain what thoughts men hold.  Even ones we have a laugh with and have done mutually supportive things with.  Women can’t distinguish between the man who rapes animals and infants and children vs the men who do not.  Again the onus is put on women to be able to tell the difference.  Let me tell you right now.  There is no test you can take for this stuff.  As one woman recently discovered her own boyfriend not only raped her dog but filmed it.  Of course she was shocked.  Its not as if this is something men brag about like I’ve said before and they don’t have special badges they wear so that we can decide not to talk to those men because they might stick their dicks in our pets.

So I throw this vein of thought into the same category as Schrödinger’s Rapist.  As it is impossible for women to tell the difference between a man who is kind and loving towards women, who would never disrespect a woman’s “no” and would certainly never force himself upon her so too it is impossible for women to tell the difference between a man who is kind, loving and protective towards animals and a man who in his private time pays to go into a brothel and choose out which sort of dog he fancies sticking his dick into or while his girlfriend is away, sticks his dick into her dog.  We have to assume that therefore that because all are a threat we need to take the proper precautions to protect our children and pets.

All the “nice men” in the world does not negate the fact that there are very un-nice men that we have to contend with.  That we are vulnerable to.  

As adult human beings, women have choices to make that effect those in our care, those who we have power over, like children and animals.  It’s utterly our responsibility to protect and ensure their safety because this not something men can be trusted to ensure.

Its time women took back whats been stolen from us.  Namely our power to protect and defend those we love.